I'm a sheep

[meretricula]

oblig tennis comment: YAYYYYY RAFA ILU FOREVER and NOOOOOO FERRU BITCH YOU BETTER NOT RETIRE I'M NOT DONE WITH LOVING YOU

ganked from various but originally willowcabin

Comment with a pairing and I will tell you:

who is the big spoon/little spoon
what is their favorite non-sexual activity
who uses all the hot water in the morning
what they order from take out
what is the most trivial thing they fight over
who does most of the cleaning
what has a season pass in their DVR
who controls the netflix queue
who calls up the super/landlord when the heat’s not working
who steals the blankets
who leaves their stuff around
who remembers to buy the milk
who remembers anniversaries

any pairing from any fandom I've been in, however long ago!

Comments

[tinymich.livejournal.com]

You know I have a huge soft spot for Fabrique (and I know you do too) so please! (Although I am somewhat curious about Piquira.)

[meretricula.livejournal.com]

PIQUIRA!

who is the big spoon/little spoon
Predictably, Pique is the big spoon. He's a fantastic cuddler. Just bundles her up and snuggles in. The only downside is that given his, ahem, excitable nature, this leads to a lot of... well. Let's say Shakira gets poked awake in the middle of the night from time to time. But she doesn't need as much sleep as he does anyway, so usually she just takes that as an offer to get things started before he's fully conscious. Boners whenever you want them are half the fun of having a toyboy!

what is their favorite non-sexual activity
...does making out without actually having sex afterward count? Okay, okay. They both really like shopping and the beach. Gerard is including both of these facts in his formal presentation on why Shakira should officially live in Barcelona. There's tons of shops! And beaches! (And he lives there! Just, you know, a reminder.)

who uses all the hot water in the morning
Pique. It is absolutely ridiculous how much time he spends in the bathroom getting ready, and he won't even let Shakira come in until he's done putting himself together. She's pretty sure he's trying to maintain the illusion that he's naturally smooth in certain areas, which is obviously ridiculous. He's watched her shave her legs before and she has been up close and personal with his genitalia many, many times, so why he needs total privacy to shave his balls is beyond her.

what they order from take out
Pique's diet is a lot stricter than Shakira's, so she usually lets him get whatever kind of food he wants; she's not picky. They both like to eat out in nice restaurants when they can, and he's trying to teach her some really basic Catalan cooking, but neither of them is very good at it.

what is the most trivial thing they fight over
Shakira teases Pique sometimes about being a kept man. This usually ends in a tickle war and him carrying her off to bed to "earn his keep".

who does most of the cleaning
Pique. He still doesn't clean a lot, but it's his house and he likes to keep it reasonably neat in case his mother comes by. He would never, ever ask his girlfriend to clean up after him; if his mom ever found out she'd kill him. He won't even let Shakira wash dishes.

what has a season pass in their DVR
Football. Stereotypes aside, Shakira really does like snuggling on the couch and letting Geri explain what's happening to her. He watches her Colombian telenovelas with her, too, even though he can never follow what's going on, even when she tries to catch him up. Moral of the story: telenovelas are way more complicated than the offside rule.

who controls the netflix queue
Pique. His house, his DVDs. He mostly watches action films with his friends while she's gone; if she's home, they've got better things to do with their evenings than watch a movie.

who calls up the super/landlord when the heat’s not working
Pique. Again, it's his house. If it were Shakira's she would take care of the maintenance, but when she's staying at Geri's he wants to make sure she's comfortable and doesn't have to lift a finger, and she doesn't exactly mind.

who steals the blankets
Pique is about twice Shakira's size, so he takes up more blanket than she does, but he's pretty much a human blanket himself, and he doesn't move once he's asleep.

who leaves their stuff around
It's pretty much even, but they're both so used to packing and unpacking all the time that nothing really gets misplaced. Pique kind of wishes Shakira would leave more stuff lying around his house, to be honest. It feels weirdly empty when she's on tour.

who remembers to buy the milk
Pique. His mother's training on the subject of not making his girlfriends keep house for him extends to grocery shopping.

who remembers anniversaries
Pique. It's only his second really serious relationship, and it's still all shiny and new and he's scared he's going to fuck it up somehow, so he's careful to do all the things like anniversaries right. Shakira thinks it's cute, but she's not really hung up on details the way he seems to think she is. She just wants to spend as much time with him as she can.

[the-beanster.livejournal.com]

Omg, this is adorable! I was gonna point out what I liked but...everything? I love that your pique takes care of Shakira bc his mom taught him to.

[tinymich.livejournal.com]

I just saw this! You are hilarious and awesome - thanks for filling the prompt!

in Other Things I Just Saw Today news (Twitter blocked at work + 15-hr workdays for a whole month = CAN'T KEEP UP), Shaki is already calling them her inlaws. I don't know how - I WOULD GET HIVES. In fact, I am already clawing at my own skin just THINKING about it. *shudder* But um, good for her? them?

Do you think they live in his place? Didn't she buy some massive house for both of them to live in?

Also, based on the photographic evidence, I actually think Montse, and not Geri, is the one trying to teach Shaki the basics of Catalan cuisine. I bet she's an enthusiastic learner, and Montse is indulgent and finds Shaki's messups rather endearing. Sometimes Geri drops in and tries to learn along with them, but he gets distracted halfway through and ends up drifting off to do something else instead, and Puyi's not there to yell at him to focus, soooo.

[meretricula.livejournal.com]

apparently it is totally normal in Catalan culture to refer to boyfriend/girlfriend's family as "in-laws", _fcb_ already had their spazz-out over this XD Pique's dad called her his daughter-in-law in a press conference or something like that. HOW CUTE ARE PIQUE'S PARENTS WITH SHAKIRA, BTW. CANNOT COPE WITH ADORABLENESS ON TWITTER. also, she is definitely way too good for him and his parents totally know it. HANG ON TO THIS ONE, GERARD, SHE'S A KEEPER.

did she? idk, my canon knowledge of Shaki's doings is not the greatest, but I don't thiiiiiink he's moved out of his place. largely because he hasn't tweeted about it. XDDD lololol anyway! maybe this is before she bought her house. ~handwave of plot inconsistencies~