this sudden horrific train of thought brought to you by red bull and nostalgia

someone who is not me should write the Συμποσιον AU where Pep is Socrates and Zlatan is Alcibiades and Pep meant well but he never cared about Zlatan as a person just as a vessel for his philosophy and Zlatan is super super bitter because fuck philosophy what about love and crashes Pep's buddies' party to tell him so and oh wait that all really happened. only with less facial hair.