meretricula: (fandom killed the gpa star)
[personal profile] meretricula
well, I guess most people who read this know that I'm a classics student (with a creepy fascination with the way sex is presented in classical poetry, hurr). I'm currently reading this book called One Hundred Years of Homosexuality, which is a collection of essays by David Halperin, and I have to say that, one essay in, it is already challenging a lot of my assumptions about the way sex worked in the cultures I'm studying. I mean, sex is not ever just sex to the ancient Greeks and Romans. it is a reaffirmation of a very hierarchical, patriarchal social system. any sex that fails to reaffirm this system is not just unconventional, but anathema. it's hard to wrap your brain around the concept that there is no such thing as love between equals in the vocabulary of classics. I guess it's just so ingrained as a romantic ideal in our time that visualizing a culture where it literally doesn't exist is really difficult. it's important not to overlay our cultural values on the ones we're studying, but still, it's just so weird to think about! oral sex was the most obscene, disgusting act imaginable in the ancient world. the penetrative or active partner in a sexual act probably didn't give a fuck about reciprocating or making sure his (and it's nearly always "his") partner had a good time. and he also didn't define himself in terms of whether he was fucking a man or a woman. the analogy Halperin used was for food: some people prefer white meat, and some people prefer dark meat, but they're still eating meat and we as a culture don't really assign any deeper meaning to that preference; it's just personal taste. some guy in ancient Athens choosing to fuck a dude or a lady was on par with asking for breast or drumstick (lol alarmingly apt terminology) at dinner now.

so I guess my point is that when we try to situate a romance in ancient Greece or Rome (don't lie, I know you've read a gladiator AU at some point in your life), there are all these other elements present that tend to get overlooked. how can we tell a love story set in this world where there is no such thing as love in the way we conceive of it? I don't mean that people didn't fall in love. I mean, come on, read Catullus: he hated Lesbia way too much not to have loved her too. (and even if you read Catullus-the-character as a fictional construct in the poetry of Catullus-the-author, the fact that he thought those emotions were worth writing about means that they must have been part of his culture's experience.) I mean that there are so many social constraints that we don't think about now that seem to completely derail our idea of a happy ending. but then people really were happy in relationships then too, I think. so maybe I'm still trying to apply my values instead of learning the values of the setting. but I think that the "happy ending" of the ancient Greeks and Romans wouldn't be very satisfying to a modern reader. Mary Renault and Georgette Heyer are two of my absolute favorite authors of all time, for instance, and they're both demons for historical accuracy, but I've never felt the OMGHAPPYSQUEEFLAIL!!!1!!1! of a Heyer happy ending in a Renault novel. "and then I married my dead boyfriend's wife and took care of her for the rest of our days" just doesn't hit me in whatever part of the brain that "and then we were wed and lived out our days as members of the wealthy landed aristocracy, helping raise her younger siblings and/or our children in the countryside and getting fat and old together" does, even though I think they're both valid expressions of the same emotion, given the time periods in question.

...now my brain hurts. maybe I should just try to read this book before I think more about it.

and while we're on the subject of AUs, have a tiny tiny snippet of a Rafa/Nole scenario that's been eating my brain for a while now:

Novak dropped into his chair with a nearly inaudible sigh and immediately began unpacking. "Pencil, pencil, fuck," he muttered, digging through his case. He wasn't late - actually, he was one of the first people on the stage, aside from Janko, who had to come in early to wheel out the timpani and get the rest of the percussion set arranged the way he liked it - but they had a new conductor this semester and he wanted to make a good impression. And in Novak's experience, nothing pissed off conductors as much as musicians who forgot to bring a pencil to rehearsal.

"Here," someone said from behind him, and a pencil materialized on Novak's stand. Novak jumped and only barely managed not to drop his bow or his viola as he spun around. "Hi," Rafa said, smiling and tan and still every bit as unfairly good-looking as he'd been before summer break. "I have an extra. You can keep."

"Thanks," Novak got out. He could feel his face going tomato-red. "Um, so how was your summer?" he added, as Rafa picked his way through the chairs and stands to get to the cello section. "Your uncle keep you locked up in a closet practicing for ten hours every day?"

"How you know that?" Rafa asked, looking over at him with wide eyes. Novak gaped at him, horrified, until Rafa let out an amused noise that could sort of be characterized as snort. "Is a joke, Nole."

"I knew that," Novak said defensively. Rafa snort-laughed again, and he gave up. "Well, your uncle is crazy, so I wouldn't be surprised, that's all."

"I have very nice summer," Rafa said. "I swim, I fish, I golf. I only practice six hours a day. Is vacation."

"You're a jerk," Novak replied without rancor. "A practice-obsessed jerk. And you make the rest of us look bad."

"Nobody ever can make you look bad," Rafa said with apparent sincerity. Novak blushed again.

Date: 2010-10-10 07:02 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] tyrannicides.livejournal.com
Hello, I am commenting creepily quickly because I am trying to write but it isn't happening so I keep refreshing my flist like LET'S SEE WHAT'S GOING ON

Anyways, this post. <3

the penetrative or active partner in a sexual act probably didn't give a fuck about reciprocating or making sure his (and it's nearly always "his") partner had a good time. and he also didn't define himself in terms of whether he was fucking a man or a woman.

This is definitely beyond true for the Romans. I wrote a paper on this shit. Not that that makes me somehow qualified to talk about it, really, but yeah. Caesar the queen, haaaa.

But expanding to the Greeks: their relationships with women were like this, definitely. But the erastes/eromenos relationship seems to defy a lot of the conventions. There's all kinds of teasing about men being totally whipped for these boys--and yeah, the teasing implies that they're not living up to the social standard, but none of it seems mean-spirited. More like, "Oh man, Dikaiopolis is soooo whipped for Diophantos. Whelp, who could blame him. dat ass." The eromenos were courted and could choose who they wanted--and the cockerel & walnut gifts and everything. It isn't love between equals, by definition, and it isn't anything like love in our sense of the word. But I think it's--accessible to the modern person? If there isn't love there, ideally, there's a lot of care and affection and general mutualness. It's kind of paradoxical, that the ancient relationship-type we could potentially relate with the most--at least in terms of reciprocation and devotion and "love"--happens to be the one that everyone freaks out over and generally avoids talking about.

You already know all this and are clearly not contradicting any of it at all in your post, I know, but when you say "classical world", I just thought of that.

But yeah, gladiator AUs are right out, lol. Though I love reading them. So much.

Date: 2010-10-10 11:14 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] meretricula.livejournal.com
I mean, yes and no? that was my immediate reaction too, because the whole idea of "lover" vs "beloved" is on some level about the lover giving up his power to his otherwise unempowered beloved, and I think the RAH RAH CHASTITY thing that you come across in some texts is about the power that's found in the ability to consent. (lol watch me poorly rephrase concepts adopted from skimming BDSM instructional manuals hurrrrrrr.) Halperin has this semi-annoying tendency to completely shut down my objections in a footnote as soon as I think of them, haha, so I will just retype his note. he's way more eloquent than I am anyway XD

"This account of the principles that structured sexual and social roles in classical Athens does not capture, of course, what the sensation of being in love was like: I am interested here not in erotic phenomenology but in the social articulation of sexual categories and in the public meanings attached to sex. Hence, my discussion of the male citizen's social and sexual precedence is not intended either to convey what an erotic relation felt like to him or to obscure the extent to which he may have experienced being on love as a loss of mastery - as "enslavement" to his beloved or to his own desire. Such feelings on a lover's part were evidently conventional (see Dover [1974], 208; Golden [1984], 313-16; Foucault [1985], 65-70) and possibly even cherished (see Xenophon, Symposium 4.14 and Oeconomicus 7.42). Indeed, the citizen-lover could afford to luxuriate in his sense of helplessness or erotic dependency precisely because his self-abandonment was at some level a chosen strategy and, in any case, his actual position of social preƫminence was not in jeopardy." (Halperin 32)

so I guess I worry that while I can totally relate to that sort of relationship and I can see how other people can too, we might still be overriding the social reality (that what we think of as the romance is just window-dressing and play-acting on top of a potentially ugly and only semi-consensual relationship) in our determination to find something we can relate to, especially in poetry and literary texts like the Symposium. I mean, very obviously some men loved their wives - there are Latin funeral inscriptions that make me want to sob my eyes out - and some men loved their boyfriends, but it makes me uncomfortable to think that I'm romanticizing the system. because let's not kid ourselves, the system is fucking creepy and based on a desire to perpetuate the patriarchy and institutionalized misogyny.

MEDIA VITAAAAAAAAAAA (http://aramleys-words.livejournal.com/3890.html) BEST GLADIATOR AU EVER. GO READ IT NOW!!!

Date: 2010-10-10 07:06 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] adela80.livejournal.com
Cute drabble! You should write more.

I love gladiator AU and I'm not ashamed to admit it. Well, not ashamed to admit it to people in cyberspace who I never have to look in the eye, anyway. I especially love "Media Vita" by [livejournal.com profile] aramley

Date: 2010-10-10 10:47 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] meretricula.livejournal.com
I have a terrible track record of writing out my ridiculous AU bunnies but this is intended to be a lot longer, so we'll see, I guess. XD and Media Vita is actually quite historically accurate! Leah's a classicist, so no shame there at all. (plus she's awesome. but first, historical accuracy!)

Date: 2010-10-10 09:56 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] hypertwink.livejournal.com
I was hoping for a coda to the US Open but hey, I'll take whatever rafa/nole there is =)

Date: 2010-10-10 10:43 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] meretricula.livejournal.com
I'm working on it! :D (well, okay, no, not actually a coda but I am working on the glasses thing. promise!)

Date: 2010-10-10 10:27 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] bronze-ribbons.livejournal.com
That I live in a universe where I can suddenly come across Novak Djokovic cast as a violist is just too wondrous for words. :-)

(And Janko-as-tympanist is making me picture him as a muppet jamming with Animal. Oh very yes.)

Date: 2010-10-10 10:42 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] meretricula.livejournal.com
it was your bunny in the first place! and it bit me hard. XDDD (percussionists are weird and Janko would totally fit in.)

Date: 2010-10-10 10:54 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] aramley.livejournal.com
I find this a lot with the Romans, that they are a deceptive people to study because we can look at them and read their words and we can sort of see ourselves in them, and them in us, and then you look at something that makes you realise how utterly alien they were. idk if that's entirely inarticulate. It just blows my mind, the absolute difference between the world as they perceived it and as we perceive it.

HEARTS IN MY EYES FOREVER for their string-section love <333

Date: 2010-10-10 11:22 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] meretricula.livejournal.com
YES, EXACTLY. and it's so much worse because we think of them as where we come from so we're always looking for ourselves in their culture, and sometimes I think we're looking so hard that we see things that aren't there. =/ I guess anthropologists are trained to take their own prejudices out of the picture but nobody ever really tells classicists what the secret is.

:DDD

Date: 2010-10-11 12:46 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] aramley.livejournal.com
I guess because classics is more sort of interpretive it's that much harder to take yourself out of the equation? I have a feeling that the Romans would laugh and laugh and laugh at half the things classicists say about them, idk :)

I love that Rafa is a cellist! Rafa playing the cello would be pure porn, omg :D

Date: 2010-10-11 01:01 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] meretricula.livejournal.com
I suppose no field is entirely free of bullshit scholarship, lol. and half the fun is reading the lunatic stuff anyway.

I have put way too much thought into this. Roger is the concertmaster, of course. Maria is first oboe and Ana is first flute and Novak is ~breaking orchestra boundaries~ by having friends in the wind section. Mandy and Juan Martin are bassists (Juan Martin got promoted to principal over Andy except then he got tendinitis and had to take the semester off but Andy is still bitter about it), all the Spaniards are in Rafa's section and Flavia is his stand partner. I think the Williams sisters are vocalists. and Adam Helfant is the new conductor. maybe Caro can be principal second violin! oh self. (of course Rafa will be subtly courting Novak by asking to play duets all the time and Novak is confused because there's basically no music for cello-viola duet and also he thought Rafa was playing duets with Roger if you know what I mean and I think you do. I do feel a little bad about stealing the basic plot of the officeverse from you, though.)

Date: 2010-10-11 01:20 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] aramley.livejournal.com
Oh god, seriously. I read two articles today that used the same evidence to come up with opposing interpretations. It's all crazy.

I WANT ALL OF THIS SO MUCH. Especially bitter!Mandy, which is my favourite flavour of Mandy :( lol, officeverse has basically no plot except for what I cannibalised from rom-coms anyway, so! It's not stealing, it's reinventing? :D

Date: 2010-10-11 01:26 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] meretricula.livejournal.com
ahhhh, academia. XD

most of the time I love how we're brain-twins and have the same characterization for everyone, but occasionally I feel like I am accidentally plagiarizing your entire mind. =/ oh well, if you don't care then I'm not going to lose sleep over it haha

Date: 2010-10-16 12:33 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] eala.livejournal.com
"I suppose no field is entirely free of bullshit scholarship, lol. and half the fun is reading the lunatic stuff anyway."

OH HAI HAVE YOU MET MY ENTIRE FIELD OF STUDY? WE BULLSHIT SO THAT YOU DON'T HAVE TO.

Date: 2010-10-16 12:36 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] meretricula.livejournal.com
lol oh man I had to sit through a seminar of "SURPRISE! LITERARY CRITICISM!" and it was awful. just. so awful. for reals. "oh look we can psychologize the characters!" "um, great. I'm glad you're happy. why the fuck do we want to do that again?" "because it's... interesting?" "and pointless..." ~headdesk~

Date: 2010-10-16 12:39 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] eala.livejournal.com
I read a quote today that said "Literary theorists are the hipsters of academia" and I was like "... troof."

Date: 2010-10-11 12:59 am (UTC)
ext_475658: (Default)
From: [identity profile] distira.livejournal.com
oh! rafa/nole orchestra!au? my music major heart is singing! please finish this :) (mm, rafa playing cello)

Date: 2010-10-11 01:06 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] meretricula.livejournal.com
school is starting and I will have no time, which historically means I'm much more likely to write fic, so we'll see! (of course he plays cello. Rafa playing Bach and Elgar? yes plz.)

Date: 2010-10-11 01:16 am (UTC)
ext_475658: (Default)
From: [identity profile] distira.livejournal.com
jaja isn't that always the case? i do the bulk of my writing during exams. i'm eagerly awaiting the rest of this! i don't think i've ever read a good orchestra!fic. (mm, elgar. and dvorak, rafa and dvorak would be divine!)

Date: 2010-10-11 01:23 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] meretricula.livejournal.com
trolololol I think it is a universal experience, alas! I hope I'll do okay at it. I was never serious about music the way the boys would have to be, but I've definitely been in a lot of orchestras!

Date: 2010-10-11 02:31 am (UTC)
ext_475658: (Default)
From: [identity profile] distira.livejournal.com
mm it is. the "anything but work" approach does wonders for authors! (and dreadful things for GPAs, A+ icon you've got on this post). i'm sure you'll do well- if you have any questions about music school or the like, feel free to hit me up, though

Date: 2010-10-11 02:22 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] oneshottoyour.livejournal.com
Discussions on love and sex in the classical world and violist-Novak, all in one post? Best thing ever. ♥ brb giggling over the mental image of Roger as the concert master while poor MAndy is that other violist who just can't catch a break

Date: 2010-10-11 02:24 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] oneshottoyour.livejournal.com
...trawled through the above comments, and LOL BASSIST!MANDY. even better. XD

Date: 2010-10-11 03:00 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] meretricula.livejournal.com
I almost made him principal second. but (a) then four section leaders would be boys and (b) even I'm not that mean. XD

Date: 2010-10-11 03:03 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] oneshottoyour.livejournal.com
lololol mandy forever playing second fiddle to everyone else SO PERFECT CRUEL

Making him a bassist with Delpo isn't much nicer, though :P

Date: 2010-10-11 03:09 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] meretricula.livejournal.com
bassists are as a general rule extremely chill potheads people! hopefully Mandy will pick up some Zen from his surroundings? (oh god how mean and stereotypical would it be of me to make Na Li and Zheng Jie violinists. I MEAN, THEY'RE ASIAN RIGHT.)

Date: 2010-10-11 03:21 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] oneshottoyour.livejournal.com
(HAHA I CAN SO SEE THIS HAPPENING. They'd both be pianists first and foremost, their parents having forced them to take lessons since they were 4, but little Jie went on to play violin as well while Li Na was all, "fuck this I WANT TO BE A PERCUSSIONIST" because she's badass like that.)

Date: 2010-10-11 10:18 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] meretricula.livejournal.com
haha Na Li would be an epic percussionist, it is true. though I can't think who should play bassoon! (I think MaKiri and Gisela are going to be the second oboe and second flute. sexiest high winds section ever!)

Date: 2010-10-11 09:14 am (UTC)
ext_20958: (stock // i heart music)
From: [identity profile] acchikocchi.livejournal.com
"Your uncle keep you locked up in a closet practicing for ten hours every day?"

"How you know that?" Rafa asked, looking over at him with wide eyes. Novak gaped at him, horrified, until Rafa let out an amused noise that could sort of be characterized as snort. "Is a joke, Nole."

"I knew that," Novak said defensively. Rafa snort-laughed again, and he gave up. "Well, your uncle is crazy, so I wouldn't be surprised, that's all."

"I have very nice summer," Rafa said. "I swim, I fish, I golf. I only practice six hours a day. Is vacation."


How much do I love everything about this exchange? So much.

And of course Rafa is a cellist. *beams*

Date: 2010-10-11 10:16 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] meretricula.livejournal.com
heee! Rafa is a sexy cellist. :D

Date: 2010-10-11 10:19 am (UTC)
ext_20958: (sm // my default sm worldview)
From: [identity profile] acchikocchi.livejournal.com
An intrinsic property of cellists, I believe. :D

Date: 2010-10-11 10:22 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] meretricula.livejournal.com
ewww my little brother is a cellist dnw dnw dnw

Date: 2010-10-11 10:24 am (UTC)
ext_20958: (hayato is hurt. in his kokoro.)
From: [identity profile] acchikocchi.livejournal.com
*DIES* okay okay, exceptions for siblings and other close relations.

Date: 2010-10-12 01:38 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] the-curlyone.livejournal.com
Your Rafa/Nole is making me grin from ear to ear. Please say you'll write more? The idea of bitter-bassist!Mandy is too good to pass up, especially if he's hitting on Rafa and the only person that doesn't realise is Rafa

Date: 2010-10-12 02:32 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] meretricula.livejournal.com
haha, well, bits and pieces, but I certainly want to get a coherent fic out of it in the end! bitter unrequited Rafandy is one of my favorite flavors too :D

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