(but, on the other hand, it isn't structured to a strict timetable and everyone knows you learn better with your peers. And practice. Lots of practice.)
slutty messi > life, basically. but I do feel we don't get enough of Bojan fulfilling the promises behind his lolita smiles. idk, it's a different dynamic and sometimes I do feel icky about it because humiliation is not my thing at all and it's hard to see bb Bo controlling the situation the way Leo does, but still. can I not get some loving comfort and reassurance for our misfiring boy wonder. preferably involving fucking him senseless. they could even pretend to let him be in charge this time, since he's got the armband and all. XD
(hee! I mean, how could they expect to be able to do it in high-pressure situations on the pitch if they haven't done it a million times in training already?)
It really, really does. I was just like akjsdjkbsdjlk the entire fic just then, because he's not only slutty, he's snarky and sweet by turns depending on who it is, and totally running the show without being an arrogant prick about it and I JUST LOVE HIM SO MUH-MUH-MUH-MUCH etc
ikr I mean who wouldn't want ot think about Bo making good on those sultry glances but then I have this feeling he wouldn't know how to ask people to stay after and I get all ;______;
I mean whut
idek
(IT HAS TO BE SECOND NATURE. INSTINCT! TRY AGAIN! film it and do post-performance reviews)
Lionel Messi: master of the art of topping from the bottom. I wonder what the old-timers thought when he came back from the Olympics all sluttified? OUR INNOCENT LITTLE BABY WHAT HAVE THOSE ARGIES DONE TO YOU. and meanwhile Leo is secretly plotting how to get them into bed with him one by one.
I think this is the problem, right? I can think of tons of sexy scenarios with tons of different people and clearly everyone in that locker room loves him to bits, but there's nobody who's really his the way the Brazilians have got each other and Leo's got Gabi and Pique's got Puyi and Andres has Victor. why did Titi have to leave ;__;
ngl I vaguely contemplated hurt/comfort about Victor and Andres double-teaming him. wouldn't solve the problem but you know they'd take good care of him for the night and wouldn't let him wake up feeling dirty and used in the morning.
(group critique sessions. "see, if you'd gotten your legs a little higher, he would have been able to hold you up by your ass and you could have sustained the position much longer. keep that in mind next time.")
ahahaha those Argies, man. Incorrigible. And Leo comes back and he still can't dress himself like a real adult person and he still has stupid hair and he still trusts everyone all the time and plays football like he's 10 and just got told he was allowed to, but. But he's also found a whole new set of activities and wants to ~explore.
but Bo does have everyone, really, in his way. They'd all punch someone for him, totally. And he's not short on affection and he's all young an lively so maybe 34985739847 different slices of love is what's fun rn
sometimes I feel like the loneliest heart is actually Xavi
ngl I vaguely contemplated hurt/comfort about Victor and Andres double-teaming him. wouldn't solve the problem but you know they'd take good care of him for the night and wouldn't let him wake up feeling dirty and used in the morning. I would like to express my approval for all aspects of what this idea chooses to be, in a fervent and appreciative manner ♥ ♥ ♥
I'm trying to decide if he'd ease his way into things by starting with Pique or Bojan or if he'd go for the all-out challenge with Victor or Xavi. actually Xavi would probably be the easiest, go over his place to watch a game, he wouldn't notice what was going on until Leo was on his knees blowing him during half-time. bless him.
though I do share your worries about Xavi! this is another situation that I think would be greatly improved by a threesome with Victor and Andres. (really is there a situation that would not be remedied by a threesome with Victor and Andres I thought not.) or excitingly cramped and contorted adventures with Leo and Andres in the bathroom of the airplane coming back from the Balon d'Or award ceremony. I mean, that French magazine cover of the three of them. suspiciously post-coital if you ask me. :D
(or perhaps he'll just pine hopelessly for Iker and their star-crossed love for the rest of his life I don't know. I just prefer the version where he gets to have lots of supremely athletic sex with Leo. hey, or Bojan! two birds with one stone! aww, Xavi could teach him to respect his body and stop trying to make everyone like him by giving them what he thinks they want. in a loving, sexy way.)
Bless him indeed. Oh, Xavi. Leo will bring along a replay of the manita clasico for Xavi to watch during and make him ~see ~stars by timing it right
I knowwwww! He has tragic eyes! WHY IS THIS VICTOR AND ANDRES SOLUTION SO PERFECT I CANNOT BELIEVE I HAVE NOT PREVIOUSLY CONSIDERED IT. Although the benefits of his courtship of Bojan are appealing to me greatly. I have considered this before, in detail. I'm pretty sure the conversation ended with me describing how Xavi would take Bojan in a thoroughly 1930's Fred Astaire/Ginger Rogers-type clinch and kiss him in silhouette against the sun going down at Camp Nou, or something. Xavi is a very vintage and classy person, in the madness of my head.
If anything went down before, after or during the Ballon d'Or, little sweet Iniesta was the instigator. Look at his face. Just look at it. He wished really, really hard and the universe gave him not one but two AND HE IS LAYING HIS CLAIM.
I want to have, like, intelligent comments, and all I've got is the fact that I spent half my morning walk contemplating how exactly Xavi/Victor/Andres would go down and I think it would be Victor's anniversary present to Andres. like, Andres has wanted this for a really really long time and never said anything because he doesn't want to hurt Victor but of course Victor knows because he knows everything about Andres and he's decided he's ok with it so long as he can be there too. and Andres tries to tell Xavi what he wants only Xavi thinks it's the same "you've been single for so long, you need to get a girlfriend" spiel he gets from his mother all the time because Andres is not great with his words and Victor has to interrupt all "no, seriously, do you want to have sex with us because that is what he is trying to ask you." WHAT IS WRONG WITH MY BRAIN. =/
I LOVE THAT PHOTO SO FUCKING MUCH. Andresito you pimp. also the ones from this year's awards where they're doing group photos and he and Xavi are next to each other, everyone else is balancing just fine on their own and Xavi is blatantly grabbing Andres' inner thigh. :D subtlety, thy name is not Xavi Hernandez.
"no, seriously, do you want to have sex with us because that is what he is trying to ask you."
so. I may have just imagined Andres and Xavi's respective expressions while Victor says that and laughed so hard I headbutted my keyboard? Ow. And then Xavi would be all like ".... I'm a gift" with a sort of poker face and Andres would fret and backtrack and Xavi would laugh at him and say something ridiculously tender idk idk
Idk what's wrong with your brain. Too much perfect, probably.
Xavi doesn't see how subtlety and sex can even fit together what nonsense. Andres, oh Andres, how are you going to deal with him and Victor and all the ~intense ~sexual ~energy jfc
... just so long as it doesn't turn out their on-pitch magic was based on UST 'cause I need them to keep being psychic and magic together forever
oh god I know exactly how this should go and I absolutely do not have time to write it but like halfway through June if you could start nagging me to write the Andres/Victor/Bojan thing that would be perfect. AUGH I CAN SEE IT WHY CAN I NOT DUMP MY THOUGHTS INTO THE COMPUTER WITHOUT HAVING TO TYPE. um. yes.
so I have been having all kinds of thoughts about Victor and Xavi lately, actually. they have really awesome chemistry, have you ever noticed? and then Sid Lowe's column about Abi brought it back to me - Victor was really, really, really scared and upset when Abi first got his diagnosis, I knew that, but the column mentioned that he called Xavi when he found out because he didn't know what to do, and it was just the two of them being scared and upset together on the phone because Xavi had no idea what to do either. I don't know, I just. he was frightened and lost and the first person he called was Xavi.
ok ok ok getting back to the topic at hand. I think Andresito's got hidden depths in there. he'll totally wear them both out. and then Xavi's all "are you fucking serious again you just got fucked by both of us!" and Victor's like "you see why I was okay with someone else helping me keep him satisfied." topping from the bottom like a pro~
(Barca's unresolved sexual tension could power a small city. the unrequited crushes on Pep alone.)
Dude I will persecute you until you write it. Starting June. Done deal.
WHY CAN YOU NOT DUMP YOUR THOUGHTS DIRECTLY TO MY BRAIN SO MUCH MORE CONVENIENT.
It's one of those weird ones where I'm like "oh, that is unexpected" and then I realise it really isn't, because I can see Victor getting scared and upset... not easily, exactly, but strongly... and idk I would always call Xavi. Xavi is ~deep ~water. Or something. You know what I mean. He knows what to do. he might not be right, but by god he's sure
We owe Sid Lowe so much, seriously. He basically has married journalism and fanfic like no other
ok ok ok getting back to the topic at hand. I think Andresito's got hidden depths in there. he'll totally wear them both out. and then Xavi's all "are you fucking serious again you just got fucked by both of us!" and Victor's like "you see why I was okay with someone else helping me keep him satisfied." topping from the bottom like a pro~
there is nothing I can add to that perfection, really. and Xavi would be a useful guy to have around you just know despite all his protests he has the libido of a teenage boy and emotional maturity when it comes to sex I MEAN WHUT
(Add in Ibi's hero worship alone and maybe a large city. Or. Small state.)
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branchandroot
no subject
Date: 2011-05-22 06:46 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2011-05-22 07:22 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2011-05-22 07:01 am (UTC)that fic
ohhh
oh ok then
(also, who taught Bartra to hug with his thighs? Inquiring minds...)
no subject
Date: 2011-05-22 07:25 am (UTC)(there's probably a course at La Masia on celebratory techniques. that one's for advanced students only.)
no subject
Date: 2011-05-22 07:45 am (UTC)I don't know if I've recovered from the original
leo
and all his
what I mean to say is
I CANNOT DEAL
(but, on the other hand, it isn't structured to a strict timetable and everyone knows you learn better with your peers. And practice. Lots of practice.)
no subject
Date: 2011-05-22 08:43 am (UTC)(hee! I mean, how could they expect to be able to do it in high-pressure situations on the pitch if they haven't done it a million times in training already?)
no subject
Date: 2011-05-22 08:51 am (UTC)It really, really does. I was just like akjsdjkbsdjlk the entire fic just then, because he's not only slutty, he's snarky and sweet by turns depending on who it is, and totally running the show without being an arrogant prick about it and I JUST LOVE HIM SO MUH-MUH-MUH-MUCH etc
ikr I mean who wouldn't want ot think about Bo making good on those sultry glances but then I have this feeling he wouldn't know how to ask people to stay after and I get all ;______;
I mean whut
idek
(IT HAS TO BE SECOND NATURE. INSTINCT! TRY AGAIN!
film it and do post-performance reviews)no subject
Date: 2011-05-22 09:13 am (UTC)I think this is the problem, right? I can think of tons of sexy scenarios with tons of different people and clearly everyone in that locker room loves him to bits, but there's nobody who's really his the way the Brazilians have got each other and Leo's got Gabi and Pique's got Puyi and Andres has Victor. why did Titi have to leave ;__;
ngl I vaguely contemplated hurt/comfort about Victor and Andres double-teaming him. wouldn't solve the problem but you know they'd take good care of him for the night and wouldn't let him wake up feeling dirty and used in the morning.
(group critique sessions. "see, if you'd gotten your legs a little higher, he would have been able to hold you up by your ass and you could have sustained the position much longer. keep that in mind next time.")
no subject
Date: 2011-05-22 09:40 am (UTC)ahahaha those Argies, man. Incorrigible. And Leo comes back and he still can't dress himself like a real adult person and he still has stupid hair and he still trusts everyone all the time and plays football like he's 10 and just got told he was allowed to, but. But he's also found a whole new set of activities and wants to ~explore.
but Bo does have everyone, really, in his way. They'd all punch someone for him, totally. And he's not short on affection and he's all young an lively so maybe 34985739847 different slices of love is what's fun rn
sometimes I feel like the loneliest heart is actually Xavingl I vaguely contemplated hurt/comfort about Victor and Andres double-teaming him. wouldn't solve the problem but you know they'd take good care of him for the night and wouldn't let him wake up feeling dirty and used in the morning.
I would like to express my approval for all aspects of what this idea chooses to be, in a fervent and appreciative manner ♥ ♥ ♥
(friction, boys, it's all about friction)
no subject
Date: 2011-05-22 12:59 pm (UTC)though I do share your worries about Xavi! this is another situation that I think would be greatly improved by a threesome with Victor and Andres. (really is there a situation that would not be remedied by a threesome with Victor and Andres I thought not.) or excitingly cramped and contorted adventures with Leo and Andres in the bathroom of the airplane coming back from the Balon d'Or award ceremony. I mean, that French magazine cover of the three of them. suspiciously post-coital if you ask me. :D
(or perhaps he'll just pine hopelessly for Iker and their star-crossed love for the rest of his life I don't know. I just prefer the version where he gets to have lots of supremely athletic sex with Leo. hey, or Bojan! two birds with one stone! aww, Xavi could teach him to respect his body and stop trying to make everyone like him by giving them what he thinks they want. in a loving, sexy way.)
♥
no subject
Date: 2011-05-22 01:21 pm (UTC)Bless him indeed. Oh, Xavi. Leo will bring along a replay of the manita clasico for Xavi to watch during and make him ~see ~stars by timing it right
I knowwwww! He has tragic eyes! WHY IS THIS VICTOR AND ANDRES SOLUTION SO PERFECT I CANNOT BELIEVE I HAVE NOT PREVIOUSLY CONSIDERED IT. Although the benefits of his courtship of Bojan are appealing to me greatly. I have considered this before, in detail. I'm pretty sure the conversation ended with me describing how Xavi would take Bojan in a thoroughly 1930's Fred Astaire/Ginger Rogers-type clinch and kiss him in silhouette against the sun going down at Camp Nou, or something. Xavi is a very vintage and classy person, in the madness of my head.
If anything went down before, after or during the Ballon d'Or, little sweet Iniesta was the instigator. Look at his face. Just look at it. He wished really, really hard and the universe gave him not one but two AND HE IS LAYING HIS CLAIM.
no subject
Date: 2011-05-23 04:58 pm (UTC)I LOVE THAT PHOTO SO FUCKING MUCH. Andresito you pimp. also the ones from this year's awards where they're doing group photos and he and Xavi are next to each other, everyone else is balancing just fine on their own and Xavi is blatantly grabbing Andres' inner thigh. :D subtlety, thy name is not Xavi Hernandez.
no subject
Date: 2011-05-24 02:41 am (UTC)"no, seriously, do you want to have sex with us because that is what he is trying to ask you."
so. I may have just imagined Andres and Xavi's respective expressions while Victor says that and laughed so hard I headbutted my keyboard? Ow. And then Xavi would be all like ".... I'm a gift" with a sort of poker face and Andres would fret and backtrack and Xavi would laugh at him and say something ridiculously tender idk idk
Idk what's wrong with your brain. Too much perfect, probably.
Xavi doesn't see how subtlety and sex can even fit together what nonsense. Andres, oh Andres, how are you going to deal with him and Victor and all the ~intense ~sexual ~energy jfc
... just so long as it doesn't turn out their on-pitch magic was based on UST 'cause I need them to keep being psychic and magic together forever
no subject
Date: 2011-05-25 01:03 pm (UTC)so I have been having all kinds of thoughts about Victor and Xavi lately, actually. they have really awesome chemistry, have you ever noticed? and then Sid Lowe's column about Abi brought it back to me - Victor was really, really, really scared and upset when Abi first got his diagnosis, I knew that, but the column mentioned that he called Xavi when he found out because he didn't know what to do, and it was just the two of them being scared and upset together on the phone because Xavi had no idea what to do either. I don't know, I just. he was frightened and lost and the first person he called was Xavi.
ok ok ok getting back to the topic at hand. I think Andresito's got hidden depths in there. he'll totally wear them both out. and then Xavi's all "are you fucking serious again you just got fucked by both of us!" and Victor's like "you see why I was okay with someone else helping me keep him satisfied." topping from the bottom like a pro~
(Barca's unresolved sexual tension could power a small city. the unrequited crushes on Pep alone.)
no subject
Date: 2011-05-25 02:48 pm (UTC)Dude I will persecute you until you write it. Starting June. Done deal.
WHY CAN YOU NOT DUMP YOUR THOUGHTS DIRECTLY TO MY BRAIN SO MUCH MORE CONVENIENT.
It's one of those weird ones where I'm like "oh, that is unexpected" and then I realise it really isn't, because I can see Victor getting scared and upset... not easily, exactly, but strongly... and idk I would always call Xavi. Xavi is ~deep ~water. Or something. You know what I mean. He knows what to do.
he might not be right, but by god he's sureWe owe Sid Lowe so much, seriously. He basically has married journalism and fanfic like no other
ok ok ok getting back to the topic at hand. I think Andresito's got hidden depths in there. he'll totally wear them both out. and then Xavi's all "are you fucking serious again you just got fucked by both of us!" and Victor's like "you see why I was okay with someone else helping me keep him satisfied." topping from the bottom like a pro~
there is nothing I can add to that perfection, really. and Xavi would be a useful guy to have around you just know despite all his protests he has the libido of a teenage boy
and emotional maturity when it comes to sex I MEAN WHUT(Add in Ibi's hero worship alone and maybe a large city. Or. Small state.)